Self(ish) Confidence

[293] Hello 2026: A Slow Start To The New Year

• Jess Clerke • Episode 293

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Ready for a new year that doesn’t demand a sprint from day one? We’re starting 2026 with honesty, a warm cup of chai, and a clear reminder that winter is for roots. The holidays were full, the house is still a mess, and yet the path forward can feel calm and strong when we stop forcing hustle and start trusting the season we’re in.

We reflect on a year of shedding—friendships, roles, routines—and how that release makes room for a steadier kind of confidence. Instead of a rigid resolution list, we choose one meaningful focus you can live across seasons. Think “be outside more,” then map it for winter, spring, summer, and fall. We share practical ideas for keeping goals visible where you’ll see them daily, and small daily actions that actually stick. Five minutes beats perfection. A sticky note on the fridge beats a forgotten note on your phone. Momentum grows when the plan fits your real life.

Hit play, exhale, and pick your one focus for the year. Share it with me for accountability, send this to a friend who needs gentler goals, and leave a quick review so more women can find a space where confidence feels like home.

Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love!

Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com

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SPEAKER_00:

Welcome to Selfish Confidence, a place where we can connect and be real about how hard it is to be your damn self. My name is Jess, and my goal is to help you build confidence and belief in yourself to live any life path you want, even if it's unconventional. It's time to flip off societal pressures and connect with women who've also felt on the outside by their life choices. We're here to encourage you to grab the mic and speak your truth. I know it can be scary, but we're in this together. Let's get started. Hello, hello! Happy New Year! Welcome back to the Selfish Confidence Podcast. It's Jess here, and I have been thinking about this episode for a while. Like, holy moly, it's 2026. And if you're listening to this in real time, I took a little bit of a break over the holidays because I had all these ideas, and honestly, Glenn was home. My husband was home, so I could have sat down and recorded, but we had so much going on from hosting multiple Christmas events to traveling to visit family for Christmas to some death in the family and just a lot of stuff happening in two weeks that I'm just like, wait, where did the last two weeks even go? And so I had to take a little bit of a pause. I'm all about coming to the mic with the right energy. And if it's not there, it's it's not happening. I really don't want to come on here and spread a message to you just for the sake of sharing words or for the sake of a download or a listen. That's just not my energy. I really need it to come from a great place and I just need a little bit of a pause. It was also my son's first Christmas, which again, crazy because I have a son, and also crazy that it was Christmas. I don't know if you're feeling that too, that you're just like, wait, what just happened in 2025? And wait how is it 2026? That's what I'm feeling today. I've been feeling that, I think, for a while. And I was reflecting even on last year at this time. I was waiting to have my baby, and I was like, they could come today, they could come tomorrow, they could come in four weeks. Like, who knows anymore? And I had no idea what the year was gonna look like. It just was so blurry, everything was so blurry, and maybe you can resonate with that too, or you're just like, I don't know what this year is gonna be. Maybe you have some things happening in your life that make it a little more complicated to create a vision for the year, or even to create some goals. And I think sometimes this is helpful because it creates a blank space for us going forward for the year ahead. I I have my last year's vision board right in front of me. And it was very simple in this in the sense that my word of the year was experiment. And my phrase was do all things with love. Like that was it. It was an experiment. I could try different things in business, I could try different things in motherhood, I could just play with the year and let it be an experiment and not be tied to what the outcome is. And I find that's easier to walk into a year with than walking into the year with a perfect vision that you have, and you're like, this is it, this is my year, and it's gonna be this way, and then you're hit with a roller coaster of a year. I don't know. I just find it a little easier to have that simplicity of the year instead of a static plan. And although this year feels very different, 2026, I'm like, okay, like I feel like myself. I am breastfeeding a lot less, so I feel like my emotions are a little calmer and my energy is better, and my body feels like mine again, and it's just a fresh start as a new version of me, but also as like a really cool, better version of me than last year, just like a lot of confusion. And so I'm really excited for 2026. I know there's some big things coming, and I know there's some really scary things in the world happening, but I am hopeful for a transition and a year that just, I don't know, brings us back to ourselves, brings us back to that energy of who we are meant to be and who we're here to be in the best way possible. I'm gonna create a little visual for you because I find that helpful when I'm listening to a podcast to kind of see in my head how they're recording. This is an audio first podcast. I was actually having a conversation with a girlfriend about this the other day, like that frustration with podcasts now also having video, and that's not a bad thing. I actually think it's really cool for those who are visual people, but I'm someone who's listening to these on my walk with my dog or in the car. I don't really have a couple hours to sit down and watch someone podcast. I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I really love an audio first focus when it comes to podcasting. And yeah, what's really interesting about that is that we don't we can't really picture what things look like. I could literally be naked right now, and you would have no idea. I am not. Uh I am not. Or am I? I'm not. But I am drinking a cup of chai tea. I made a nice cup of tea, put some extra cinnamon in there for some, you know, good energy to come into this podcast today. And then I have, I feel like real witchy over here. I have a smudge, like a sage stick going over here because my office is also our guest room, and our house had a lot of people in it over the holidays. And so I just wanted to clear some energy and to sit in it and just feel, I don't know, being back here, the newness of the year, but it does feel a little strange. So I wanted to paint a picture for you because maybe you're feeling that too. My house is chaos. Like, I feel like our playroom, which is also our gym space, is just toys everywhere. There's so many toys, and there's also like a mess in the kitchen. And Christmas is our goal this weekend is to take Christmas down, but it's just, there's just stuff everywhere. I'm also doing laundry at the same time as doing this, and I create that visual for you because I really had to close my eyes and ignore the mess and get down here on the microphone. And I think sometimes we think, how do they do it all? I get that actually often. And myself too. But what right now, currently, what I'm putting on the back burner is all of that mess. We are ignoring it, we close the door, we're smudging some energy, and we are just gonna hang out. A couple of sisters hanging out and chatting today because the mess can wait. One of the things I tell myself as much as possible, it's like that stuff doesn't matter. The messy stuff, not that important. The toys everywhere, not a big deal. I'm gonna put them away and he's just gonna pull them back out. So let's just relax a little bit, focus on what's important, being present with each other and enjoying the moment. Because we don't get today back ever. We do not get to do over freaky Friday, all that stuff. What's the other one? Groundhog day? That is not real. Although sometimes I wish it was. It is not real. So we really need to be here and be present when we can. So that's what I'm choosing to do today, and maybe you need that reminder too. A little choice to be here in whatever that here is for you. And take a deep breath and hang out and just remember that it's all gonna work out. It's all gonna get sorted, the house will get cleaned, it's not that big of a deal. Okay? It's not that big of a deal. So let's hang out. How are you doing? How is this year feeling already for you? I know it is early, and I know that it's hard to create that vision, but I've been reflecting a lot on last year, on that 2025. And I had to really step back from a lot of things, this podcast included. So if you're here and you're listening to this and you have stuck around, despite there being weeks that episodes didn't come out, or the energy is not the best, or whatever it is, or you hear a baby crying in the background, I'm pretty sure I did an episode last year with my baby in my arms. Like doing what I could to keep this going, I appreciate you being here through that messy year as much as possible. Like, I really, really am so grateful that you have been listening, that you've been a part of this, that you've been sharing the episodes, and that you still feel connected even as I walk into 2026 as a totally different version of myself than the beginning of 2025. And I'm just really, really thankful for our friendship and for our connection. And I'm just, yeah, it's been a such a big season. And even as I looked at this Spotify wrapped, I wanted to share some of those stats with you, but I don't know where my phone is, and I'm not gonna grab it because as soon as I do, we're down the rabbit hole. It's done. We're we're lost in the world of our phone, right? But there were some really amazing statistics on this podcast last year when I thought that it was all gonna go to shambles, right? Just because of time and energy and all the things. But, you know, we spanned over more countries than we ever have, which is incredible. You know, this was shared uh so many times, and it was on top podcasts and top 10 podcasts for people for so like a lot of people. And I was just like, thank you. It really, really means a lot. Like it means so much that you're listening and that you connect with it and that you love it and you keep coming back for more. And so my goal and focus for this year is to bring you the best, bring you the best guests on this podcast, bring you the best messages, only coming with the best energy, prioritizing selfish confidence. I was gonna say over anything, but you know what I mean when I say that. Over a lot of things. Obviously, family first, as always. And then when it comes to sharing with you, I'm gonna bring you the best because I love this space. I love spending time with you every week, and I finally feel like I have the energy to really do that for you, to really offer you the best of me. And so I'm really, really excited for this year and everything that's to come. And with thinking about 2026 and where we're going, it never once slipped my mind to think that this would go anywhere. And I know as a nine-year, and we've talked about this before, we were releasing a lot of things. We've all lost something, something of ourselves. Maybe a family member, maybe there's a lot of loss and shedding of friendships and things like that in 2025. But we are not totally out of the woods yet, I will say. It doesn't transition into the year of the horse from the Chinese calendar until about the middle of February. So just hold your breath here, okay? January is going to be filled with still some shedding and some release, but just know self-confidence is not one of those things for me. It is not. I love, love, love being here with you. And this podcast has been like a verbal diary over the last four years of my life, and I can't even imagine a season without it. So I'd be curious about what you're thinking about for 2026, and maybe even what you shed in 2025. I know a lot of us have been shedding so many things: roles and friendships and and and houses and moving and starting new families and all of that stuff. So it's a kind of a wild season to be stepping into something new, but I'd be so excited to hear, you know, what you got rid of and what you were stepping into. I have been like shedding a lot of stuff, releasing a lot of stuff, getting rid of clothes that don't fit anymore, getting rid of, you know, toys that, you know, my son doesn't play with, and just trying to keep things so simple here in the house. But it is hard. We have a lot of stuff. Even as I came in this office, I had to like clear all the stuff off my desk, and it's a lot. It's a lot, especially after the holidays. And so, yeah, physical stuff, emotional stuff, all of the things that we're shedding right now, there's still gonna be a little bit of time for that. When it comes to 2026, I just wanted to remind you that the year starts in the winter. And I was trying to look up some information on this because I find that so silly. That our calendar and that time that we're like, okay, new year, new me, let's go. I got the energy. It happens in the winter. And I don't know if you've stepped outside or actually where you're listening to this, I should also say, but it is very cold. And even though, yeah, some of my goals involve doing and getting things done, this isn't necessarily the best season for that. And so we often give up on our goals and on our resolutions for the new year because January is a really weird energy month for us to be trying to do. It's essentially a month for us to rest after the holidays. I don't know about you, but Christmas is not restful for us. It is busy. We have so much on our plates. We are going and we're eating all the foods. Like it is not a restful season. And then all of a sudden, January 1st comes and we think we're supposed to lace up our sneakers and run a marathon. That is not the energy of the early months of the year. And if it works for you, honestly, I love that for you. Okay. I am so proud of you that you can get things done and it doesn't feel like a drag. But for a lot of us, especially for us females, like in the winter months and the cold, it's supposed to be a season of nourishing, of resting, of healing, of bringing that energy back into our bodies so that we can in the spring bloom with the flowers. Yep. So we can bloom with the flowers. And I just find it so wild. And I've only really started to think about this in the last couple years because I've always been a New Year's resolution girly, like, like let's go big, like run a marathon kind of thing. But it's just not the right time. If you're running a marathon, I love that for you. I'm so proud of you. But also, if in a week from now you feel burnt out and you can't train for a marathon, do not give up. Just push the day to the marathon a little bit. Push your training schedule a little bit so that you can rest and heal for the month of January and bring it to life in February. Like bring it to life even a little bit later, like March or April. But I find this month it's a really great month for that restful energy, that coming to ourselves energy, the meditating a little bit more, reading a little bit more, crocheting a little bit more, and leaving some of that doing energy for later in the year when we have that energy, that sunlight a bit more. I just find the dark mornings, because we are up early over here, the dark mornings and the dark evenings very difficult. Even yesterday I went to go bring some bread and butter over to my neighbor, as good neighbors do, right? I went to go bring my bread and butter over, and I brought my baby with me, and you know, it's dark. It was dark, it was 5 30, and it was dark, and I was like, well, I'm gonna look like that crazy mom taking my baby for a walk in the dark, but really I was just going over one street or one like one driveway. It wasn't a big deal, but it's dark at 4 30, 5 o'clock where we live, and it is dark till about 7:30, 8 a.m. sometimes here, and so it's just short days and the sunlight is not always there. So remember that as you're setting goals, and maybe you're being a little hard on yourself because it's you know the beginning of January and you haven't finished your marathon yet. Just slow down, sis. Okay, take a breath. Remember, it's not that big of a deal if things don't get done today or even in the month of January. We have a lot of time. Don't give up on them. Do not give up on your goals, but give yourself some grace in this season. If it doesn't feel like that oomph you is there in January. Just because it's not there doesn't mean it's not gonna get done. Give yourself some time to rest after the holidays, to heal, and to move forward with the flowers. Blooming with the flowers. I've just been thinking about that a lot, especially when it comes to the winter months. We put a lot of pressure to get things done now, but it's not gonna be now. I'm gonna continue shedding, I'm gonna continue getting rid of the things in my house that just are not necessary anymore, that can be released. Resting, healing, and then moving into. I got on my list to run a 10K. So hold me to that one, and also a whole bunch of other things that I really want to focus on for this year. Uh, and it's just giving myself that grace and that time to do it. I had a word of the year, but I don't think I wrote it down and now I lost it. So that'll be on my list for our vision board party that I typically do every year, just to kind of bring a visual to the life that I want to have. So, what is it that you were working on? What is it you want this year? Please send me a message and share with me because I am always so curious. And I think when we share what we're working on and what our thoughts are, it helps us to spark ideas for what might be cool for us. Like, oh, like oh, Jess wants to run a 10k? Maybe me too. Okay, I'll send her a message and we could run together. Awesome. Can't wait. It actually will get me there. And also, even as I'm looking at last year's vision board and all of the things that came to fruition, some that didn't and some that did, there's beauty in this year coming up. And if you're listening to this now and you're like, I would love someone to hold me accountable and I want to hang out with some amazing people in person, we still have a spot open for our Barbados retreat happening May 3rd to May 9th, uh, 2026, which is now, how crazy is that? Uh, for a shared room, shared room twin beds in Barbados. We have an amazing, I say we, it's me, but I have an amazing group of people who are coming with me. And the vision for this week that we're gonna have is all about transformation, it's all about your confidence, and it's all about being 100% you, finding you and being in a space for a whole week that allows you to be that version of yourself. I have had many relationships in my life where I didn't get to be myself. And so you don't get to practice on the daily being the truest version of you because there's so many people who are like, You've changed. You're weird. Why are you acting weird? And you're like, I'm not acting weird. This is who I am. This is a week for you to be you, even to experiment with versions of you that you have, you know, hid away for a very long time or you've masked for a very long time. This is a place for you to just be, be you. Like exhale and be you. And we do that through daily workshops. We also have tours, uh, we have some. I'm trying to think of all the activities that we have planned for this. We have catamaran tours, we have a tour of the island. If you have come before and you're like, oh, but we did that before. I have picked different spots this time because I think that we have a lot of repeat people who are coming. I want us to experience new places, and there's so many beautiful things that we can see on the island that I could pinpoint a few different spots that I could take you. We are also doing a delicious and elegant dinner out. Like it's just a lot of really beautiful plans for a wonderful week. And I think it's a true testament to a lot of repeaters from last time we went to Barbados are coming back for another week. And although it's a different house and a different space, it's it's gonna be an amazing week. Like we are really, really excited about it. And I can't believe that we get to start the countdown now. So If you're looking for a space with amazing women and an amazing week away, this is for you. And if it sparks a little something in you, you're like, I'm just curious, Jess, send me some info, send me a message. It is not a contract to send a message and to chat about it and to talk about the options and the payment plans that we can create for you. So I just want you to know maybe this space is for you. I think this space is for you. And I'd love to see you in Barbados. So moving on. There are a couple things that I wanted to share with you today. As we are in a new year, and I know we're thinking about this stuff. There's a couple different things that you can do when you're stepping into a new year to just start fresh. I have a couple rituals that I create every year that really help me to feel like myself as I walk into a new year. And although last year I really didn't know who I was going to become, and even now, I still don't totally know. I think I've thought about this a lot. It's like if I was to peak at 35, like the next 35 years are gonna be pretty boring. Like we gotta keep going and keep growing and moving and changing and evolving. And however that works for you in whatever season that you're in, a few of the things that I do every single year is just spend some time writing down what I want to come to fruition. Glenn and I talked about this in the car yesterday too. Like, if you were to focus on a fun goal or you were to focus on something for this year that's not like, you know, make this much in my business or yeah, run a marathon or whatever it is that you have on your list. Like what would be the focus? And we were talking about just being outside more. And so if that was a vision that you had, like when you're thinking about, okay, this year, if I were to focus on one thing, what would it be? Okay, being outside more, how can I bring that to life this season, like right now, today? How can I bring that to life in the summer? How could I bring that to life later in the year and stop and not forget about it? Because I don't know about you. I bet you do this too. You forget, you make a goal in January, and you forget, and then you never remember again. And you know what? It's so funny because like you'd be like, what was my resolution last year? If I didn't make a vision board, I probably would forget it. In the sisterhood, we used to do every 60 days, like a workshop to help you to set goals, and so often, but by the time the 60 days were done and we were reflecting and doing it again, we would forget what that focus was. So, whatever that thing is for you, like I said, for us being outside more, write it down somewhere for one, and write it down somewhere that you're gonna see it as often as possible. Having a note on your bedside table, maybe it's on your fridge, maybe you keep it in the notes section on your phone. I don't always suggest that one because I don't know about you, I'm not often looking at my notes. I've I write things down and then I leave them, right? So it needs to be somewhere that you're gonna see it as much as possible because you do have to create a plan around it. You can't just say, I want to be outside more, period, and then leave it. And then like every once in a while you go outside. No, when you have an energy that you want to bring into the world and into your life, you need to start to take action on it a little bit. So the first thing that I do is figuring out what that thing is that I would want to focus on. It doesn't have to be, you know, read a hundred books or like have a number to it. It's just I would love to be outside more this year. Okay, like what would that look like? How can I do it in this season today? So, you know, putting getting the right winter gear is one thing, right? I need to get some winter boots, getting the right gear so that in the winter time we can also still be outside more, making sure that I have a snowsuit for my son because he also needs to be warm if we go outside more. And uh looking at some different activities in the area that can get us outside. Is there different hikes in the area? I just saw that there was a mom and baby nature group. Like, how cool would that be that would get us outside more? Um, finding different parks that we might want to check out in the city, going on daily adventures that can take you outside, even if it's just for 15 minutes. Like there are a lot of little things you can do to make that happen. And uh, how can we do it in the summer? Can we plan a trip that's by the beach that maybe would get us outside as much as possible? You know, when we are in Barbados, our villa is like very airy and it has a beautiful pool. We're close to the beach. That's gonna give me a week to be outside as much as possible. And and finding these little pockets and planning for them helps to bring that vision of your life to fruition. So I'd love to know like what's that thing? Fun thing, big thing, business thing, whatever that is for you. How can we bring it to life now and in each season going forward? What's that saying that they say like planning isn't half the battle, it is the battle. Like it's truly that when it comes to the energy of creating some of the things that you want in your life. And again, remembering that this is the winter, it's not about doing, but it is a great season for you to start to feel like reflecting on last year, what worked for you, what didn't, and where do you want to go this year? We don't have to necessarily have action right now, but having a plan will really help you to get there. And it has to be a plan that you're going to see whenever you want to start it, whether it's today or in the spring, having a plan that you're like, okay, it's there, it's on the fridge. I know, come March 1st, I'm gonna start doing this thing. I'm gonna start writing my book. I'm gonna start, I'm gonna start the podcast myself. I am going to start posting on social media more. Whatever it is that you want to bring to life, just have it somewhere that you're gonna see it every day. And also have it somewhere that people might ask you questions about it, which is super uncomfortable. Really super, super, super uncomfortable. I I don't I don't like doing that. But also, it's really helpful because you saying it out loud, you talking it to people, you bringing it to life is a really important part of having this dream come true, having this energy come true. So, and maybe it's just saying it to me, text me, send me a message and be like, Jess, this is the vision. I see it, I want it, I'm too afraid to tell anyone, but I am gonna tell you. And I'll be like, sweet, I love it. Let's bring it to life. And also have put it in a place that someone might ask you about it, like your partner. I think it's important to keep some of our goals safe from the people who might not believe in them, but I also think it's really important to open up the goals to some of the important people in our life who might support us, who might be excited for us, who might push us in the direction of getting that done. So often I hear the story of keeping things a secret because we're scared. And I see you. There are so many things that I would love to just tuck in my bra and and not tell anyone about. But that's not gonna get us where we want to go. We gotta share our vision, we gotta share our light with the world and in little little ways play with trusting some people with the vision that you have. So write it somewhere that you're gonna see it, and also maybe where other people are gonna see it. Those are a couple things when it comes to bringing the energies and the goals of the new year to life. And also the last thing I'll say on this is remembering it doesn't have to be today. It doesn't have to start today, it doesn't have to, you know, bring to light what goals you figure out on let's say like June 7th, then that's the goals that you create on June 7th, and you can go from there. I remember when I did the year of confidence, I started in October. I think October 1st, and it really kind of only started like October 5th or 6th. And you bring it to life when you want to bring it to life. You do not have to wait for January 1st, you do not have to wait for a Monday, you don't have to wait for February, this perfect looking month that everyone keeps talking about because it starts on a Sunday and it ends on a Saturday and it's like four perfect weeks, whatever. Okay? We don't need to do that. You could start on a Wednesday in the middle of the year, and that'd be perfectly fine too. But the first thing you need to do is figure out what it is you'd want to start and maybe have a bit of a plan around that and bring it to life. This doesn't have to be complicated, it can be really simple and it can be really small. I actually think some of the best plans are simple and small. Because we can stick with it and we can go further. And I love that. I love that. If it's something that you can do in five minutes a day, great. I got a streak on Duolingo that's like 129 days of doing my French lessons, and it's only because it takes five minutes a day to do my French lesson. Like it's I wouldn't have that if I needed to read a chapter a day in a book. Some days I don't have time for a chapter a day, but I do have time for five minutes of Duolingo, and I think that's a win. I did have read 12 books on my vision board. I see it there, staring at me, and I did not do that. But I'll keep it there for this year. Maybe I'll have more time. It's okay, it's not a big deal. We have time. So I'd love to know what you're working on, what it is that you're focusing on for 2025 or 2026. Did it again? How long are we gonna be writing the date wrong? A couple weeks? Yeah, probably. So bring it to life, sis. You are worth it. You are worth bringing your dreams and your visions to life. And I'm so freaking proud of you for having ideas, for being here, for hanging out with me, and for sipping some chai tea with me. You're probably like, it was Glenn. If Glenn's listening to this, he's gonna be like, I don't want any chai tea. Sip on whatever you want to sip on. But think about where you want to go and how you want to get there. And then share it with me. Send me a message. And if you are loving selfish confidence, again, I told you I'm putting so much energy in this this this year. I really want this to be a space for women to come and be themselves. And again, whatever life path you decide to be on, this is a space for you. And I would really appreciate a review. If you can drop a review with a few little words, what you love about the podcast, it's gonna help us to spread this message to as many people as possible this year. And that's the vision, that's the goal. I really want to connect with many women who are looking for a space like this. So if you love it, please, on whatever platform you listen to, please drop us a review. And I just want to thank you so much. I'm so excited for this new year, and it's a very different energy than 2025, and I am ready for it. Are you? What's up, sis? I am so glad we can hang out today. If you love this episode, send it to a friend or share it on your social media and tag me so I can personally thank you for helping me sprinkle some confidence in the world. And don't forget, you are magic. Let's show the world your shine.

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Jess Clerke

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