Ever found yourself hit by a wave of creativity at the most unexpected hour? I had one of those late-night sparks that simply couldn't wait till morning. Wrap up your day with my reflections on celebrating milestones and breaking the norm of bonding over negativity. I'm baring it all—how I've learned to embrace my achievements, big or small, and why it's crucial for you to do the same. Gone are the days of dimming our successes; let's lift each other up with stories of triumph!
Building a path to success is never a lone battle—it's about the tribe that rallies around you. In this heart-to-heart, I dive into the art of crafting a supportive community and the small, yet crucial steps that lead to change. I'm sharing the game plan that's surrounded me with incredible people, crucial for both personal and professional leaps. It's about the power of incremental progress, taking aligned action, and why the journey of a thousand miles really does begin with a single step. Get ready to fortify your network and watch how it transforms every facet of your life.
And don't forget to leave a rating and review where you listen to the Self(ish) Confidence podcast to join me for a confidence chat that could spark your journey to a bolder, more assured you. Send a screen shot to my DMs, and I'll send you the link to book to celebrate your growth, together.
Check out the Self(ish) Sisterhood.
Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love!
Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com
If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋
My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke
The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence
Ever found yourself hit by a wave of creativity at the most unexpected hour? I had one of those late-night sparks that simply couldn't wait till morning. Wrap up your day with my reflections on celebrating milestones and breaking the norm of bonding over negativity. I'm baring it all—how I've learned to embrace my achievements, big or small, and why it's crucial for you to do the same. Gone are the days of dimming our successes; let's lift each other up with stories of triumph!
Building a path to success is never a lone battle—it's about the tribe that rallies around you. In this heart-to-heart, I dive into the art of crafting a supportive community and the small, yet crucial steps that lead to change. I'm sharing the game plan that's surrounded me with incredible people, crucial for both personal and professional leaps. It's about the power of incremental progress, taking aligned action, and why the journey of a thousand miles really does begin with a single step. Get ready to fortify your network and watch how it transforms every facet of your life.
And don't forget to leave a rating and review where you listen to the Self(ish) Confidence podcast to join me for a confidence chat that could spark your journey to a bolder, more assured you. Send a screen shot to my DMs, and I'll send you the link to book to celebrate your growth, together.
Check out the Self(ish) Sisterhood.
Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love!
Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com
If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋
My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke
The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence
Welcome to Selfish Confidence, a place where you can connect and be real about how hard it is to be your damn self. My name is Jess and my goal is to help you build confidence and belief in yourself to live any life path you want, even if it's unconventional. It's time to flip off societal pressures and connect with women who've also felt on the outside by their life choices. We're here to encourage you to grab the mic and speak your truth. I know it can be scary, but we're in this together. Let's get started. Hello, hello and welcome to this week's episode of the Selfish Confidence podcast. It's Jess here, and I've been thinking about this topic a lot lately because it's something that keeps coming up and up and up, and when that happens I just have to put it out there. And I am recording this at a time that I would just like never, never, typically record. It is almost 10 pm, which, if you know me, you know I'm normally in bed by this time, but at the time that I'm recording this, my husband goes to hockey. He plays hockey a couple times a week and on those late nights I just if he's playing at a late game, like a 940 game, I am not going to sleep very well, so I might as well do something that fills me up. I just got off of a group coaching call for my program, confidently you, which is our 12-week confidence boosting course, which we are on week eight. It's blowing my mind the things that are happening in this like beta edition of this program, and I'm like you know what, if I'm on fire, we're going to do it, we're going to record it, even though it's totally out of what I would normally do, and maybe you're like that too. You're a person who has like it's not even that I have like a flow to things that work really well. I just typically like to do things midday, when the sun is out, when I'm feeling my best. But things are feeling really good right now and I'm excited to sit here this evening, totally out of the norm, totally out of how I would normally do things, and just like record something for you. So let's lean into this. I'm gonna set the mood, set the vibe for you, because it is so important that, even though it's not how I would normally do things, I still think it's important to fuel things a little bit, to get things in the right mojo. So I got my calm tea here, I got my mood lighting on. I am really just leaning into this flowy energy that I have tonight and I normally do not record with the door open. That is something like I'm like a big no-no, especially because my dog's normally crazy, but this is the time of day that she's sleeping, everybody's sleeping. I just have one cat that's kind of mosing around. So if you're watching the video of this on a social media post or anything and there's a cat that pops up, it's not the norm either. We're just gonna try something totally new and totally different tonight.
Speaker 1:And I am excited because this topic has been popping up over and over and over again lately and it's like that how did you get so far so fast, jess? And for a really long time I resisted the idea of that. I'm like, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I didn't do anything, little old me. I haven't done anything cool. And I know that's a lie, because what I've been doing over the last couple of years is really freaking cool, and what I've achieved in two short years is really freaking cool. And I mean it when I say I resisted it for a really long time and I didn't resist the cool things happening. It's not that I was like, wait, this stuff can't happen. It's that I resisted the acknowledgement for it, the celebration of it, and I resisted it in myself. I didn't wanna see myself as someone who was achieving anything out of the norm or anything beyond I don't know what even deserved praise, and I think that's something that I needed to heal through and I needed to work through and really step into what I meant to do here and what I'm building as something that's really freaking cool. And as big things come this year, I think I'm starting to see it a little bit more and I'm just accepting that things are good. Things are really good right now in business and in life and in our family and in all of the things that are happening. It just feels really beautiful and I'm finally okay to admit that.
Speaker 1:And maybe you're listening to this and you're like that's really weird, jess, like why wouldn't you wanna admit when things are good? But I don't know if you've noticed this our society is really freaking weird. When people are seeing success or when people are optimistic, they want to bring us down. When you go to a store and someone's like, oh, how's your day going? You're like, oh, you know, really crummy, that weather we're getting right, and everyone's like, oh yeah, that weather is so crazy, you know, oh well, and we just like can go on and on and on in complaining together.
Speaker 1:It's really easy for us to understand and connect in that negative energy than it is when you walk into a store and you're just like everything's so wonderful, my life is so good, great things are happening, business is booming. I'm so freaking happy, everything's so beautiful, especially from strangers, and the rest are just like whoa, this girl is a little too much. The energy here I cannot understand, I can't equate to. It just doesn't feel good for me and it's really hard for us to connect on that positivity level. And I've noticed that more and more and more as things have been good and I am an optimistic person to my core. But it's been easier to downplay what's going on in my life, because if I do that, it helps to make other people a lot more comfortable. And maybe you're listening to this and you're like I hear you, jess.
Speaker 1:Good things are happening in my life too, but I don't like to talk about it, or, you know, I want good things to happen in my life, so I love seeing them happen in yours. I know it's okay for me too, but it's really hard. It's really hard when everything in the world feels crazy and I wanna be optimistic, I wanna be hopeful, but this feels hard and I see you and I wanna connect with you on this. That's why I was like really leaning into this energy tonight about downplaying our success, but also like how did you get here? How did you get to where you are in a short period of time?
Speaker 1:And before I get too far deep into it, I wanna remind you that in the Selfish Sisterhood this month we're talking all about manifestations. I can see my vision board, even as I record this right now, and I know and believe in the power of manifestation. I truly do and I think that that has a piece into all of this beauty. It's like dreaming something. I am a great dreamer and bringing it to life is really beautiful too. But this month in the Selfish Sisterhood, our workshop is with my very good friend, evie, and she is going to be sharing with you all of her insights and how to have more confidence when it comes to manifestations, and that workshop is next Tuesday night at 8 pm Atlantic Standard Time, that's 7 pm, eastern time. And I am so excited for this workshop, like I think it's gonna be a beautiful thing for all of us to dream together and then take some action in order to make those dreams happen. Manifestation is great, really putting that idea of what we want, also with that action piece, and I'm so excited to bring both of those together in the Selfish Sisterhood this month.
Speaker 1:So if you're listening to this and you're like, okay, I want to bring my dreams to life, I really want to lean into this energy. There is a seven day free trial. You can sign up right now, check it out, join the workshop, see if the community's for you and either continue on with it or step out. You can cancel anytime and I think that's the beautiful thing about this space. It's all about taking your confidence journey to the next level, having a space where you can start to practice, having more confidence, saying and using your voice, really stepping into what's meant for you. And this is the best month to do that, with this manifestation workshop happening next week. So I just wanted to side note on that so that you know what's coming up. But there are so many beautiful things in that community. I'll link all the information for you in the show notes and having community around me has been huge when it comes to this progress. That is probably the first thing when it comes to what has excelled and really been a catalyst for this vision that I've been dreaming for a really long time.
Speaker 1:When I started the podcast to where I am now was really surrounding myself with the best people and I went to events in-person events that, as I grew my podcast, I could connect with these people and have them on my podcast, like I could really find and connect with people. Most of the people who are on this podcast I have met in real life or have connected with over social media to a point where I trust them to come on and chat with you. I am very particular, especially in the last six months, who has access to this community. I don't just invite anyone on here, although I have in the past and I've learned from that. That's a whole part of this process, right, learning from the things that we've done. But I'm really really strategic on who gets to chat with you, who gets to connect with you, and you can know when I have an episode with a guest it is someone who I trust and I love, and I think that's a really big piece.
Speaker 1:In taking that action to the next level, I often forget that the real world can be really harsh and not as supportive. Because I've surrounded myself with amazing people all of the time, like and I don't just say that to brag, it was very strategic and I have really have an amazing community around me all the time. I have someone who I can go to when I need to vent about marriage or life in general, or someone that I can talk to about you know, different areas of my life Maybe it's business, maybe it's my physical health, it's fitness Like I have people who I can lean on in all different areas of my life, and I did that because I knew I needed community around me if I wanted to achieve these big things that I have on my heart. That's the truth. Even if you have one supportive person if it's a coach, if it's your best friend, if it's your partner one person can make a really big difference. But I've built a community around me that is unshakable, that when, if something were to happen God forbid, something happened and I really needed support, I would have it, and I think that that's a huge piece when it comes to these big visions.
Speaker 1:Surround yourself with big dreamers, surround yourself with really supportive people, because that is the step into really making these things happen. And we've heard this before right, we are the, we're an image of the top five people we spend the most time with, or something like that. Right, we've all heard that before. But really embodying it and living it is a whole other thing. Like having coaches, having community and having the people around you who you need in your life to help you, like, get to that next level. Even just for the accountability piece is huge and, along with that community around you, it's the action. It's like many Actions, and I think this is the one that when people are like okay, how did you get to where you are right now, they don't love the answer because the answer is hard frickin work, hard work and also aligned work. I am not a person who is like hustle until you die. You got to keep going, you got to keep doing these things.
Speaker 1:Record your podcast at 10 pm. This is not a norm for me, okay, but what is a norm is action, and even in like the smallest sense. That's something that we've been working on a lot, and confidently. You is like Bringing it down to the smallest thing that you can do. Like what can you commit to? And when I first started this podcast, it was just committing to sitting down on the mic and recording an episode. It didn't have anything to do with business, it didn't have anything to do with this dream that I had. It just had to do with using my voice, practicing, doing it really uncomfortably and Putting myself out there. That's it, the visibility aspect of it. It's like the smallest thing. It was action. This could even mean for you, like one minute a day of getting in tune with your body, connecting with your physical body. Like what does my body need right now? Maybe it's a minute every day of meditation. It's like spending time with yourself or moving your body.
Speaker 1:For me, this, the year of confidence, was a huge catalyst for all of these pieces of my life and it really was like small action steps. It was never big things, it was never. And it was never like meditate for an hour on a rock outside a day. Like that is never gonna be me. I shouldn't say never. Never say never. You don't know, but it's not something that I see in my foreseeable future. Okay, it's not. It's not, you know, something that's the typical for me to sit on a rock for an hour. It doesn't have to be these big things.
Speaker 1:I think we often think, okay, well, if I want top-notch health, I got to do 75 hard. Or if I want to be the best parent in the world, it means like no screens for my kids ever. Or if I want to be the best partner, it means like being with them all the time. We do not have to do things big in order to do things beautifully. We don't. What we do have to do is take small action steps. So if you're trying to be a better partner, okay, well, maybe it's communicating with them and asking them what they need and taking those small, simple actions in order to really align With what they need and also with what you can provide.
Speaker 1:Maybe it's you want to build a business, you want to start a podcast, you want to do something, but you don't know where to start. That's the message that I've been getting a lot lately. It's okay, okay, I know I made for something bigger. I want to do all these things. I want to do what you're doing, but, like I don't know where to start, and the simple thing with that is that it's just to start, it's to do something. Maybe it's to amp up your social media a little bit more. Start talking about this idea that you have.
Speaker 1:That was one thing that I was taught at the beginning was to bring people along for the ride, share with the community when you want to make a change, or Ask them what they think about things, or bring them along when you're planning an event or when you're launching a podcast, or when you want to start a business. It's about talking to people and letting them know what you're doing. And if you're into human design, for some of you Like, this is crucial for your success. You leaning on people and sharing with people and talking about things is crucial for your success and, again, that's a whole other topic. But it's really about getting to know yourself and then taking those action steps that you need to take in order to See the success that feels aligned for you.
Speaker 1:But it's all about, like, mini action steps every single day, like the smallest thing, the thing that you could be like, oh, like I don't know, when we start a new habit and then we, you know, get tired of that habit. We don't want to keep going, it being so small that you can keep going even when you're exhausted, even when you don't want to do it, even when you're like laying in bed and it's 10 pm and you're just like, oh, oh crap, I told myself I was gonna meditate for a minute today. Dang it, I can do it right now. It's one freaking minute and really just being able to show up even in the smallest chunk. If you were to plan that you were going to do an hour of meditation out on a rock and it's 10 pm, there is no way you are crawling out of bed and going to go find a rock outside and meditate for an hour. There's just no way. If you do shadow to you, I love that for you, but that's just not me. And so it had to be small things, it had to be really attainable things, and even as we do these small things, you start to trust your body more, because your body is like, oh, like we do the things that we say we're going to do, sweet, even if it's as simple as one minute, right, your body and your brain, they don't know. They just know that you're doing the things that you said you were going to do Awesome. Check that box Did the thing. That makes a big impact on your confidence and a big impact on moving forward.
Speaker 1:The other piece to this journey that has been really helpful is making sure that it's aligned. Every single thing that I do is aligned with where I am right now. It doesn't mean that it might be aligned in six months from now or in a year from now, but, like right now, the decisions that I'm making and the actions that I'm taking are aligned. And if you're listening to this and you're like okay, like well, what does that mean, jess? What does it mean for it to be aligned? And it just means that it's what I'm feeling called to right now. So I have had a few messages lately I want to host retreats or I want to, you know, start a business. So I want to start a podcast and if that's you, I want you to ask yourself like which one of those is top priority, which one is the one that feels best for you right now, and maybe even like which one of those is the least scary, because this journey is going to be scary.
Speaker 1:I remember when I put out my first podcast episode, I was going to say I literally pooped my pants. I didn't literally, okay, poop my pants, but it felt like it. It felt really uncomfortable, it felt really itchy and as I did that and put it out there, oh man, did it scare me. But it was also the one thing that was probably the easiest to put out there Because, although it was scary, it didn't have a big, like financial hit to me. It didn't have a big, you know, time commitment to me. It really was just about recording an episode and putting it out there. Okay, well, that's not that scary, I can do that. Yeah, some people are going to listen to it and some people are going to find out that things have been really difficult, but that doesn't mean anything. They're just going to know the truth. That's not so bad.
Speaker 1:So what can you commit to, what can you take action on? And maybe what's the least scary and maybe you're listening to this and you're like you know what, jess, like I'm ready to go all in, I'm going to, I'm going to dive in scared. I love that for you Like, I am so excited to watch this journey of you stepping into your truth and shining so bright and doing all of these beautiful things in the world that actually is going to like push you beyond. But for me it was always about these mini actions, having the right people around me and maybe doing like the least scary thing, like in that moment. Because as I expanded that that becomes less scary. And then, as I expand a little bit more, that next level that I thought was totally crazy is way less scary. And even now, as I plan this massive event for 200 women to come together and to celebrate their confidence and use their voice and speak up, it's scary but it's not as scary as what I thought it was going to be two years ago. And even in planning retreats, what that first retreat was scary. And even now, as I plan an international retreat to Barbados, it's scary, but it's not as scary as it would have been if I had started that two years ago. I'm a little bit further along and that all comes from just like taking those confident action steps and really getting into a space that it's okay, I can level up. Now I can do that next thing. I didn't just dive in and plan a big event for 200 women. Honestly, I think if I did that, I don't know if anyone would have come, because nobody would have known who I was. It's about building on these little things over and over and over again.
Speaker 1:Consistency in the podcast, simple, right, we can do that If it feels aligned. You can do that If it lights you up. Step in that direction, reach out to a friend and be like, hey, I'm thinking about this idea, what do you think? It really doesn't matter what they think. All that matters is that you took the action to even voice it out loud, because that's the scary part too. Make sure you're picking a safe person, not a person who's going to be like oh gosh, don't do that, that's absolutely crazy. Maybe send the message to me. I will hype you up all day long. I am going to be celebrating you, no matter what that piece is. Whatever it is that you want to do, I'm not going to tell you.
Speaker 1:It's crazy, even if it's to, out of the gate, plan an event for hundreds of women and you're just like I don't have any visibility. Yet I 100% believe in you, truly, because whatever is aligned for you, whatever feels really good for you, what is on your heart, is meant for you, like God wants you to bring that into this world. We need you to bring that into this world. So if it's there, I want you to listen to it and plan out just a few small actions that are gonna help to build your confidence, that are gonna help you take you to that next step, and I have zero doubts that in two years from now, you're gonna be doing massive things, things that you can't even fathom right now.
Speaker 1:You're like I am a nobody. How could I be doing something like that? And I feel really emotional as I say that, and if you've been listening to this podcast for a while, it's been a long time since I've had all these emotions come up. But I just want to remind you, if you feel like a nobody and there is no way in heck that you could do this big thing it's not true. You are someone really frickin' special. You are an absolute gift to this world and we need you to take action. Not only do you need to take action for yourself and for your family and for the stream that's on your heart. We as a collective, the world needs you to take action because you were meant to do something really frickin' special. If it's on your heart, it's meant for you and I really want you to lean into that energy. Send me a message, connect with me, come, check out the sisterhood surround yourself with really incredible people that believe in you and are gonna help to push you in a really special way. So I know it feels really scary. I know it, I feel it, and I know someone listening to this right now is feeling that, because when I get emotional like that, I know there's someone who needs to hear this. So I love you. Please connect with me, because I want you to know you're not alone in this and we can do these big, scary things together, because I'm pushing myself too. That's what this is all about. I hope you have a wonderful week and you dive into a little more confident action.
Speaker 1:And I also wanted to remind you real quick because I just do not do this enough is how important reviews are for this podcast. I do not ask for reviews very often I actually don't remind people of it at all but I am reminded more and more on just how important they are to help get this message to more eyes, to more people. So if you love this podcast, if it's helping you and supporting you in a way that you need right now with your confidence, it would mean the absolute world to me. If you dropped a rating and a review. Wherever you listen to your podcasts, it really helps to boost this podcast even more and really to spread that message to so many more people. So please help to support this podcast with your ratings and your reviews.
Speaker 1:And if you do and you want a little confidence boost, you wanna book a confidence chat? Send me a DM. Screenshot the review that you put on there. Send me a DM and I'll send over a link for a complimentary confidence chat. I offer a couple of these every Friday, just like quick little chats where we can connect, get to know each other a little bit more, work on your goals and see what it is that you need. But after you put a review, yeah, screenshot it, send it to me in Instagram and I will send you the link to book a complimentary confidence chat with me for the next opening on Friday. So I am so freaking grateful that you're here and so grateful that you're taking action towards a confident life. What's up, sis? I am so glad we could hang out today. If you love this episode, send it to a friend or share it on your social media and tag me so I can personally thank you for helping me sprinkle some confidence in the world. And don't forget you are magic. Let's show the world your shine.