Ever find yourself in pyjamas, grappling with the day's chaos yet striving to keep it real? That's precisely where my adventure began before hitting record on today's podcast. I get candid about the scrambles and stumbles that almost derailed our latest episode, only to find that a pause and a dose of self-care could recharge the spirit and the conversation.
This week, I tug at the threads of authenticity, unraveling the beauty of unmade-up truths in the daily grind. Join me as we swing open the doors to February's Selfish Sisterhood, where we're not just sipping tea but sipping wisdom from our guest Bria Wannamaker, illuminating the corners of mental health and self-discovery.
As we peel back the layers together, I encourage you to embrace every hue of your authenticity, reassuring that within our community, you'll find a troupe that champions the genuine you, with all its perfect imperfections.
Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood, a community where you can truly be yourself, no matter what life path you’re on! We welcome women who are craving deeper connection through a journey of confidence building + self-discovery.
--> LEARN MORE HERE
Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love!
Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com
If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋
My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke
The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence
Ever find yourself in pyjamas, grappling with the day's chaos yet striving to keep it real? That's precisely where my adventure began before hitting record on today's podcast. I get candid about the scrambles and stumbles that almost derailed our latest episode, only to find that a pause and a dose of self-care could recharge the spirit and the conversation.
This week, I tug at the threads of authenticity, unraveling the beauty of unmade-up truths in the daily grind. Join me as we swing open the doors to February's Selfish Sisterhood, where we're not just sipping tea but sipping wisdom from our guest Bria Wannamaker, illuminating the corners of mental health and self-discovery.
As we peel back the layers together, I encourage you to embrace every hue of your authenticity, reassuring that within our community, you'll find a troupe that champions the genuine you, with all its perfect imperfections.
Join the Self(ish) Sisterhood, a community where you can truly be yourself, no matter what life path you’re on! We welcome women who are craving deeper connection through a journey of confidence building + self-discovery.
--> LEARN MORE HERE
Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love!
Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com
If you're on instagram, come say hi!! 👋👋
My Personal Account ---> @jess.clerke
The Podcast Account ---> @selfishconfidence
Welcome to Selfish Confidence, a place where you can connect and be real about how hard it is to be your damn self. My name is Jess and my goal is to help you build confidence and belief in yourself to live any life path you want, even if it's unconventional. It's time to flip off societal pressures and connect with women who've also felt on the outside by their life choices. We're here to encourage you to grab the mic and speak your truth. I know it can be scary, but we're in this together. Let's get started. Hello and welcome to this week's episode of the Selfish Confidence podcast. It's Jess here and I'm sitting down to record this for the second time today, and I know what you're thinking like, jess, you don't have to tell me that you've been struggling on this one, but I do. That's what this podcast is all about. It's about bringing you along with me and sharing with you what's going on, and especially with this episode being about authenticity. I really wanted to be real with you. The fact that I tried to do this already earlier today. I recorded half of the episode and I just scratched it through it in the can and said no, I was sitting down to record this episode and you've heard it on here before it's not the best time to record. Around dinnertime the animals get a little crazy, everybody's barking waiting for Glenn to come home and it just can get really messy. But for some reason that's the pocket that I left open today to sit down and record. I was like you know what I can do this. I took Polly out to the park. She should be tired, we'll be got this. We got this.
Speaker 1:I sat down, I made myself a decaf latte and it just didn't feel right. Nothing felt right. I kind of got into a flow, tripping over my words, a little, just not feeling like myself, and along with that I had my dog going crazy in the background, barking at everything that walked by. I tried all of the tricks, like taking her out for a pee and giving everyone food and just locking people in rooms and by people I mean pets, okay, they're not people, pets in rooms so that I could record this episode for you. And even now, as I sit here, fully refreshed from taking a break, from stepping back and coming back on the mic, I know I made the right choice to just stop it and to come back when I felt better, when I wasn't cussing and yelling at my dog to shut up. We've all been there. You know what I'm talking about. And now I'm sitting here with a raspberry tea in my pajamas recording this no makeup, nothing because that's what feels best and feels authentically me.
Speaker 1:And before I get into the rest of the episode that I really have been had on my heart to share with you, I want to remind you that doors are open for the selfish sisterhood right now for the month of February, which is really exciting Because in the month of February, not only do we have our regular monthly Q&As, our sisterhood chats, where you can come and talk about literally anything that's on your heart, a place for you to voice and practice being you in a place that feels really safe and also we have biz chats. It's not just for business owners, but it's for you to come and chat some ideas out and get everything on the table and get other people's opinions on what you're working on. But of course, we have the Morning Club Monday, wednesday and Fridays for you to help build your morning routine. And on top of that, in February we have my very good friend, brea Wannamaker, coming in and talking all about mental health in the month of February and how to support yourself through that, and I'm just really excited for this month because it just feels like a different season. January has been cool, but it has been a little bit chaotic over here and it hasn't felt like that natural ease into the year like I had hoped, especially with my year, my word of the year being peace. It's just been a feeling a little crazy and I'm really excited to focus on mental health in February.
Speaker 1:So if you're looking for a community to come in, to be yourself, to make some new friends, whether that's locally or online, this is a beautiful space for you to do that. So I'll put all the information in the show notes for you to be able to check that out, but you can also send me a message so we can chat out. If it's a good fit for you, there is a three day free trial so you can come in, check out the community, join a call and see if it's free. So, with that being said, let's dive into today's topic all about being authentically you, and I think it's kind of funny that I'm coming here and sitting down on the mic right now and I feel so at peace, like, I feel really calm and I even feel emotional, as I say that, because that was not the case a couple hours ago when I tried to do this earlier Like not at all, and I just felt bitter and unaligned and angry and uncomfortable and I was forcing something that I just didn't want to force.
Speaker 1:This podcast and you listening to this means more to me than a lot of things, and I have always made it a point to show up here as my best and most authentic version of myself. But of course, there are times when you know maybe the time of recordings, interviews, or just even the timing of getting some of these episodes out, maybe I have missed being totally in, 100%, authentically me. Truth is you can't be you all the time. Well, you can, kudos to you if you can sit here and be like I am me all the time. Kudos to you. I love that for you.
Speaker 1:But for most of us it's really hard. It's hard to predict our moods, especially as women. In the cycle that we're in, it's hard to predict how we're going to feel or what our mood is or what foods react to our body or all of these pieces. When it comes to feeling like you, 100% you, and feeling confident. There are a lot of factors in that. Some days and here's the thing, sis you won't know what is authentically you, or what feels aligned, or what is you. Without getting to know yourself, without starting to ask yourself some questions or understanding when your body feels good and when it doesn't, or when you're feeling angry and really getting comfortable with some of your emotions. If you don't know these things about yourself, it's really hard for you to understand what is authentically you and what is an influence of your family or an influence of a dog who will not stop barking, or an influence of a bad day. We don't know these things unless we start to get really clear on who we are at a core, like right at the center.
Speaker 1:When you tear away the layer of being a mom and when you tear away the layer of being a podcaster, or when you tear away the layer of being a partner, or you tear away the layer of being a teacher, a nurse, anything right. When you start to tear those layers away, what's inside, what's in there? When you take away that piece of someone who enjoys drinking tea or someone who enjoys drinking coffee, or you take away the layer of being a surfer or a snowboarder or whatever? A Canadian right. When you start to take those layers of you away, what's inside? Who are you? At a soul level?
Speaker 1:And I know you might be listening to this and saying, jess, I didn't think we were going there today. This might be a little too deep for me, and maybe it is, but I also truly believe there's a reason that earlier I couldn't record this episode and for some reason, now I'm having a little bit more clarity. It's because there's a message that maybe you need to hear today, and so I just want you to hear me out, because really starting 2024 with understanding who you are authentically is really going to help you to have that solid base. And maybe you're like Jess, I don't know who I am outside of parenthood or outside of my work, or when I think of confidence, I'm really confident in my work, or I'm really confident at home and I'm not so confident in some of these other areas. I see you.
Speaker 1:So many of us are facing exactly that too, and when it comes to these areas of our lives, I want you to just lean into the ones that maybe you do feel confident in. What about that makes you feel freaking awesome? What are the pieces about your work or your home life or your hobbies that makes you feel really, really good. What about it? And peel back the layers on that, because as you start to learn the deeper meaning to it, that's where your authenticity comes from, that's the center, that's like the inside, and I know it's really freaking hard to do, but you can just start to trust things in your body.
Speaker 1:Earlier today, when I sat down to record this, I was getting angry and as I was doing that, I could just tell that I wasn't from the place that I would want to share in the world. I wasn't from my authentic and feeling good place. So sometimes it takes slowing down and just starting to understand those feelings, and so I want to ask you, when was the last time you felt really confident? Or when you felt like yourself and you're just like, oh yes, this time in college, I was at this party, I was wearing this sick outfit, I was looking so good and I just felt like me. The clothes on my body felt really good. I loved my crazy hair, I felt really good in how I was speaking. All of these pieces right. What about this moment was you?
Speaker 1:And I want to remind you here for a quick second that there can be different versions of us. This conversation that I'm having with you on the mic today actually came from a conversation I was having earlier with a girlfriend Talking about being truly you, and there's a version of me that feels best in my pajamas, hanging out on the mic with you right now, or chilling out on the couch, never leaving the house. There's a version of me that that is authentically her. She loves it at home, she's an introvert, she thrives in being alone with, just like, yeah, being alone. It's just so interesting to think about because for most of you, if you know me in real life, I can be really outgoing, really energized, excitable. If you know me from events, you know I have some energy, I love to dance and I love to just be wild and crazy. And seeing this other version of me, the quiet one at home, who just really loves being alone, and the version of me at events that's loud and hugging everyone and having a really, really great time. I just want to remind you that both of those versions can be authentic versions of me. It's not that one is better than the other, or, when I'm in this mood, it's a more authentic version than this mood. These can exist at the same time. We can enjoy being at home, we can be an introvert and also enjoy going out.
Speaker 1:So when I'm asking you these questions like who you are at a court, maybe it's a couple different versions of you, just like when we look at a wheel of life and we look at your personal life and your spiritual life and your fitness life and all of these pieces that you can kind of rate things in a different direction. It's the exact same thing as this. So are you being authentically yourself in these areas? And if you were to rate from 1 to 10 in each of these areas of your life let's say, in your home life, in your work life, in your spiritual life, in your wellness life, in your hobbies and all of these pieces that make up you, if we were to look at each of these sections, how would you rate yourself as being authentically you in these sections? From 1 to 10? Because maybe you're a total fake.
Speaker 1:When you walk in the office, you put on that suit and you go to work and you're just like. This is so not me. I feel so uncomfortable in these clothes, but I'm here and I'm doing my job and it pays the bills and I am making it through, or maybe it's the opposite. You're so authentically you at work. You speak up, you use your voice, you feel comfortable there, but when you come home you don't. When we look at these different areas, it can actually help you to have a better perspective on who you are and why you let yourself shine in different areas, and that's why I think the Selfish Sisterhood again side note is just like the best place for this, because for most of you, you don't know anyone in there. I know that's really freaking scary, but you get to come in and show up as an authentic version of you, because we don't know any other version of you. We don't know the version of you that isn't able to speak up at dinner. We don't know the version of you that struggles to be confident at work. There's so many pieces to it. We just know the version that you show us. So how great would it be to have a clean slate, to really figure out what is authenticity at its core for you.
Speaker 1:And I just want to remind you that you were created the way you are for a reason. Maybe you think you're weird. I think I'm weird all the freaking time. I know I'm weird I shouldn't say weird, different but maybe you're all different. You have different hobbies. You enjoyed sword fighting or whatever. The world doesn't really get it. I bet if you're listening to this podcast, you understand that we are very different here. We do things differently, we do life differently, we're unconventional, and that is a beautiful thing. I actually am tired of the world conforming to one way of doing things and I feel like we're in this stage where maybe it's my age, maybe it's where I am in life, but that we're starting to step into being able to shine exactly as we are, and I truly believe that you have a purpose and you're filled with magic and there's all these things that need to come out of you.
Speaker 1:But life and trauma and society and fear have put a wall in front of it and it makes it really hard to shine through and to break down some walls and step into it. So I wanted to ask you today really quick, before we close up this episode is what's blocking you from being you? Is it the people you hang around? Is it the job that you have? I know there's things that sometimes we have to do. I totally get it. Had I had no time this evening, maybe I would have sat down and done the episode earlier because I had no other window to do it. But we can make some choices here and I want to know what is that thing that's blocking you? Because if it's fear, we can get over that. If it's lack of confidence, again we can step through that. If it's the people that you spend the most time with, that one might be more difficult, but we can make it happen. We just have to work through some of these blocks that are stopping you from shining your freaking light all over the world.
Speaker 1:And when I asked social media this week, what did you connect with more word-wise, is it unconventional or is it authentic? Whole Buddy, the people who picked authentic. There were so many more. There was a handful of people who picked unconventional and I still really love that word and I feel like when I describe it, people can connect and can relate to it more. But when it comes to authentic, I think people connect with it, with confidence, a lot more, a lot easier.
Speaker 1:And if that's you and you're listening to this episode and you're just like, yes, I want to live a truly authentic life, I want to be me. I want to shine brightly. I want the world to see all the different layers of me. I'm really freaking scared. I see you, sis, I am right there with you. I remember the first time I put myself out there on this microphone, I was a mess at the idea that my family was going to hear my truth or that strangers might hear my truth. But here I am, two and a half years later, still sharing on this microphone and I wouldn't trade it for anything in this world. But I want to do it from a place that feels really good and feels authentic and from a place where I can keep going for a really long time. So look at every area of your life right now. Where do you feel really good? Where do you feel like you're thriving, like you feel like you if you have nothing in your closet that feels like you we got to make a few shifts here If you have no clothes that feel like you because you've changed, because we all fricking change, it's time to switch things up. We got to donate some things and get some new pieces and really start to step into the energy of finding out who you are Because, yeah, again we've changed. We just went through a really big thing All of us collectively huge, massive, global thing. We've changed. So it's time to meet yourself again.
Speaker 1:I am so fricking proud of you for taking the time to ask yourself some hard questions, to spend some time with yourself and to really sit in that energy of being authentically you. What does that mean to you? And if you're struggling with it, send me a message, connect with me online, because I would really love to help you to meet that person of you, to meet that version of you that just truly shines in this world. I love you so fricking much. I hope you have an awesome week. I'll see you next time. What's up, sis? I am so glad we could hang out today. If you love this episode, send it to a friend or share it on your social media and tag me so I can personally thank you for helping me sprinkle some confidence in the world. And don't forget you are magic. Let's show the world your shine.