Overcome the winter blues with these simple suggestions

Winter's chill can often cast a shadow over our daily lives, but within the frosty embrace, there's joy to be uncovered. In this episode, I'm here to share how the simple wonders of sunshine and the simple tracks of wildlife in my yard have lifted my spirits. This episode is a tapestry of personal anecdotes and tips, where I explore how small moments can spark profound delight.

As the cold seeks to isolate, remember the warmth of community is just a reach away. The Selfish Sisterhood stands as our digital refuge, a place for unfiltered connection and support. This episode wraps you in the comfort of shared experiences and simple mood-boosting strategies—think a minute in the sun or the indulgence of a manicure. Tailored to what you need, when you need it, I'm on hand to remind you that it's perfectly okay to ask for help. Extend your hand—online or offline—and let's lift each other up through the season. Share this episode with a friend in need of a winter pick-me-up, and together, let's brighten the colder months.

Learn more about the Self(ish) Sisterhood + our amazing February calendar.

Check it out: Understanding the mind/body connection with Psychotherapist Bria Wannamaker

Get your ticket for the Splatter Room Self(ish) Social happening Friday, February 2 at 7PM.

Thank you for listening to Self(ish) Confidence! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend or on your social media and tag me @jess.clerke so I can personally thank you for helping spread some confidence + love!

Check out my website at: www.jessclerke.com

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:02

Welcome to Selfish Confidence, a place where you can connect and be real about how hard it is to be your damn self. My name is Jess and my goal is to help you build confidence and belief in yourself to live any life path you want, even if it's unconventional. It's time to flip off societal pressures and connect with women who've also felt on the outside by their life choices. We're here to encourage you to grab the mic and speak your truth. I know it can be scary, but we're in this together. Let's get started. Hello, hello and welcome to this week's episode of the Selfish Confidence podcast. It's Jess here and I have just been feeling that winter energy where today, if you're listening to this live, it's the first day of February.

Speaker 1: 0:45

We made it through January, which feels really freaking good. Right, but there's still something in the air where it's the wintertime and it's colder and it's messy out and it just does not feel the best. When I was just out on my walk with Polly, we were taking a quick little walk where we can only go 20 minutes spurts. Right now it's a little too cold to keep her out too long. Barbados dog problems, okay, and she was feeling it. She was feeling the cold. I was feeling the cold, but the sun was shining and it really felt like a beautiful day. Even though it was the winter and even though it was super uncomfortable and I was bundled up to the max, I could still appreciate the sunshine for just a quick moment. Or I could still appreciate the crunch of the snow under my boots. Or I love one thing I really love about the winter, which might be a really funny thing to think about but one of the things I really love is being able to see paw prints in the snow, so I can see if there was another little doggy where we walked, or I can see where the birds were playing in the snow or where maybe a bunny hopped across our yard. It just is a really, really small thing, but sometimes Glenn will come home Glenn's my husband, for those of you who are new here and I was just like, oh my gosh, you can tell that there was something playing in the snow over there.

Speaker 1: 2:09

Those little things help light up the winter season, and I don't know if you have any joyful moments like that too that you're thinking of right now, that you're like oh, you know what I really love how my kids or my dog plays in the snow. It's so fun to watch, or I really love how trees look with the snow on them. There can be really joyful and small moments that come with the winter, but there's also some really dark and heaviness and difficult things, and that's what I wanted to talk to you about today just a few things that can help you see beyond the winter blues right now if maybe that's what you're feeling, Because it's kind of that season where you're still in the dead of winter, we're far beyond the season of the holidays, the beautiful lights and all of those beautiful things, and we're into this season in the middle of, like there being no real holidays and there just being this like heaviness. I know things are going to get better, but when we're in it it can be really difficult. So I wanted to talk to you about a few of those things today that can really help you to step out of this. Before I do, I wanted to remind you of two things.

Speaker 1: 3:17

Being the first of the month, we have a brand new sisterhood calendar, so you'll be able to see that on my website. I'll put that in the show notes below, but we have some really exciting things coming up this month. So, alongside our regular Monday, wednesday, friday, sisterhood morning club, which is where you can come and get into your morning routine and have some accountability, we also have our sisterhood chats every month where you can come in just kind of like talk about what's going on in your life, what you're facing as a sister right now, what you're going through and also what you're celebrating Like how great is it to have a place that encourages you to celebrate things in your life, like I love that about the sisterhood. We also have biz chats where we get to sit down and brainstorm ideas and talk about what's working in your business and what you need support on and how we can support each other. But then on top of that, we also have goal setting Q and A's in there, a place for you to come and really get clear on what you want and then practice living that in these calls and in these spaces. And then in the month of February we also have Bria Wanamaker coming in, who's my very good friend. She's a psychotherapist and she's gonna help us with mental health in this season, especially with that self love season and really just stepping into the energy that we might need a little extra support right now when it comes to our mental health, and that's okay. So I'm so excited for that workshop. I love Bria so much and everything that she shares. She's been on the podcast here before so I'll also put her episode in the show notes if you wanna check that out before the workshop.

Speaker 1: 4:39

And the other thing that's really exciting about the sisterhood and right now is that anyone who's in the sisterhood is getting first dibs on the tickets to the live event, on VIP and regular admission tickets for the event happening in October. This is my first time hosting a large live event with incredible speakers, with this like super fun sunset cruise for VIP night. It is just going to be such a beautiful weekend, october 5th and 6th in Halifax, nova Scotia. Tickets are going on sale in the sisterhood on the 10th and then to the public after that. So if you're like I want my ticket and I want VIP and I wanna guarantee that I'm gonna get there, join the sisterhood, snag your spot staying an opportunity to grab a ticket before anybody else, because they get tickets for everything first. So I just wanna put that out there If that's something that interests you. Tickets are going on sale really, really soon and I'm so excited for this event.

Speaker 1: 5:36

So now that we have some things to look forward to when it comes to what's coming up, just like sit in that energy, sit in that excitement for a second, like, oh my gosh, like how cool would it be to go to this event, or how cool would it be to have a community around me, or maybe you're in the sisterhood and you're like I love being a part of something like this. I just want you to remember that feeling that's in your body right now, because there is joy in little things like that, like being a part of a community or having something to look forward to. The things that come in the future can actually bring you just a little bit of spark right now, a little bit of hope to help get you through a really difficult season like the winter. And if you're someone who struggles with seasonal depression, where I know a lot of us do I'm a Canadians, I feel you on that there are some things that we can talk about today that might help to get you through this hump as we go into February and March and then hopefully we got some longer days coming in April, right? And the first thing I really want you to focus on is what do you need? Because I'm gonna share some things with you and they might help, but you're the expert on you, like 100%. You know you, okay, and if you don't that's why you're here You're trying to figure out those pieces to yourself.

Speaker 1: 6:53

So, before I give you a bunch of list of things that you could be doing, what do you need? Maybe just like, sit in your body right now, take a deep breath and just like, wow, what do I need today? What's gonna help to fill my cup up? Maybe it's literally filling your cup up with another cup of coffee. Is that what's gonna warm your soul today? Is that what's gonna feel good for you? Is it taking a moment and calling a friend and going out to the coffee shop for a little bit, or maybe taking the long way home and enjoying a little extra quiet in the car? What do you need? And when you start to think about what it is that you need right now, in the season that you're in, in this moment, that you're in like right now because, again, this is ever changing what you need right now might be different than what you need tomorrow or what you need next week. Okay, what do you need today? And then, along with what you need, I want you to sit in that energy of what lights you up, like what is actually the thing that puts that smile on your face, like I am lit up, hanging out on this mic with you right now. Drink a little bit of caffeine over here, have a nice quick moment where the house is quiet and my dog is not going crazy because she's been a little crazy lately and it just feels so nice to have a moment to hang out with you. It lights me up to be planning this event. It lights me up to watch my favorite show and sit on the couch for a little bit. It lights me up to play music in the car Maybe it's a hobby that you've been wanting to try or you've been wanting to get back into for a really long time or moving your body.

Speaker 1: 8:26

Like what actually fuels you? Is it cooking dinner? It can also be like those mundane things or like playing with your kids where someone would be like roll their eye at you. That that's what you said. But if that's what lights you up, I want you to follow that and make that a priority in this season. And like it doesn't matter what it is, it really doesn't. It could be like hanky-panky in the in the like with your partner in the bedroom or wherever you want to. Hanky-panky Like. I don't care what it is, I just care that you make it a priority and nobody's going to judge you for it. If you want to keep it to yourself, you can.

Speaker 1: 9:01

You are not a weirdo because you do things differently or you like things that are different. That's why we're here, right, we're all different. We like things to be outside of societal norms, so I want you to lean into that energy. Maybe it's playing in the snow yourself, you know, putting your snow pants on and getting out there too, or sliding down the hill. What lights you up right now?

Speaker 1: 9:24

Because I feel like when we're in this season where things are harder and we're in this season where it just, it just feels everything feels like a chore. You know what I mean? Like everything feels like a chore cleaning the bathroom, although it is a chore, like you're like, that can happen. I'll bring that back in the spring, right. Everything feels like that. So when you're feeling that and you find a spark, like a tiny little spark, I want you to chase it and go after it. Maybe you're walking through the craft aisle in the dollar store or in your local craft store and you see something that catches your eye and you're like I could never do that. I want you to try it and lean into that energy of something that lights you up. And those are those two big pieces like what do I need and what lights me up? And if you don't know the answers to either of these, I want you to try a few things and see how they feel for you. And, like, again, getting clear on this is really important because it's going to be different for each and every one of us, but maybe you can try a couple of these things.

Speaker 1: 10:27

So, one of my favorite things in this season and it is not something that can happen every day, because again it is the winter, okay, but getting some sunshine on my skin, on my face, on in my eyes. I heard that like sunglasses, sure, they're great, but like also we need to get sun in our eyeballs, even for like a small portion of the day, because that helps just to like regulate things in our body, just helps us to feel a little better and again it like radiates off the snow and if you're in a place that there is snow, just use that like one minute, even standing outside, taking a deep breath in and a deep breath out, and just get some sun on your skin, because that actually really does help. Going out for this walk with Pauly today, although it was really cold and I did not want to go, it really helped me to feel better to sit down on this mic and to get really clear on what I wanted to talk to you about, because a little bit of sunshine goes a long way and we only have a short window of it. So if when you go to work in the morning, it's dark and when you get off work at night, it's dark, try to get out in your lunch break or like tell the world that you just became a smoker, even though you're not, and just like get outside. Whatever it is that you need to do to force yourself to take a quick break to get some sun in your eyeballs and on your skin every single day, it's going to make a difference. Okay, so I just want you to prioritize some sunshine, whatever that looks like for you, and if you're someone who lives in an apartment and you don't really have that easy access to getting sunshine on your skin, then maybe invest in a happy light or invest in something that might bring that warmth and that sunlight into your space, because we know like these are the things that I'm gonna share with you right now. They're not new ideas. You know these things. It's just a matter of actually doing them. And maybe you listening to this today and you're feeling really down and everything sucks and the world is cold. This might be the peace and the reminder to just take one minute to get some sunshine in your eyeballs, okay. Or to roll the window down when you're driving, even though it's cold, to get some fresh air, just to help boost your mood a little bit more, okay. So that's the first one to get some sunshine on your skin. Try that out, see how it feels. I like to put like, not sand, well, sand would be nice but snow in my hands too. Put a little snow in my hands and see how that feels, just to get a little connected with nature. But that is just like taking an extra step. So all I want you to do is get some sun in your eyeballs, okay.

Speaker 1: 12:57

Second thing again, this is not new news, but it will be really helpful is to eat good food. I don't have a lot of energy this time of year and I don't always wanna be cooking. Okay, but you can have good food without putting too much effort in. Okay, a brown rice and a nice salad and maybe some, you know, a rotisserie chicken, like it doesn't have to be really complicated things. But again, lean into that energy of like what do I need? And that can be. What does my body need, like what is gonna help me to feel good and to fuel it. So some of the foods that might keep you warm, like a nice, like roasted butternut squash, roasted beets, like just cut them up, you don't even really have to peel them and throw them in the oven. Okay, with some olive oil on it, we can make it really really simple and still be really great fuel for our body.

Speaker 1: 13:48

It's actually interesting because in the last couple weeks I went a little overboard on the treats and that's not a bad thing, but when you're someone who has food allergies, it is okay. It was not a great, you know, turnaround and I really had to take like three days of laying on the couch to regulate my body back, to cut the foods out that were making me sick, that I was just enjoying okay, it was enjoying a little too much. And this week I feel like a whole new human, cutting out some like foods that I know are really aggressive in my body and, as I've talked about here before, like I do have SIBO, so sugar is still a really big issue. So cutting back on some sugar and really just like getting and clearing things out, it didn't have to be complicated. But now I feel like a whole new human and I feel like my body is like on a really good cycle and I'm like, okay, is this really what you feel like when you cut out some of those allergens or you cut out some of the things that just don't feel good for you? What are those things for you? What does your body need? And I'm not here to tell you to cut foods out at all. That's not what I'm saying. What I am saying is tune into what fuels you and tune into the things that's dragging you down. So let's do less of the things that are dragging us and more of the things that fuel us, because this is a season that already feels so hard. So let's make it a little bit easier on ourselves. A bagged salad, frozen veggies, whatever. You need A freaking soup right now. Okay, I'm gonna make you hungry. I'm so sorry, I'm already hungry, but a nice warm soup doesn't take a lot of effort, but it's really gonna make you feel better and feel your soul right now, okay.

Speaker 1: 15:24

Another thing that I have on my list that really helps me in this season is to start a project. I know we don't wanna do anything this time of year, like we do not wanna do anything, so me asking you to start something is a lot right. So I really want you to lean into that. Like, what would light you up and start a project? Having something to work on in the evenings that's not just Binging Netflix is actually really helpful. You could even do it while you're Binging Netflix. Like, let's say, it's a puzzle, right, your project could be a puzzle and you do it while you watch TV, or maybe it's, you know, doing some watercolor painting. Like, what is a project that would light you up? Maybe it's a renovation in your house that you've been putting off for a really long time. I got a couple of those that my husband and I need to get on. So start a project. It doesn't have to be something huge. Again, it doesn't have to be like tear your whole house apart. It's like really small things like crochet, a napkin or I don't know. Think of it, what lights you up and what you need, and make that be a project that you can work on. Again, for me, like a puzzle is really fun, even a video game like I don't take a lot of time to sit down and play Animal Crossing, even though it's something that could be really fun. So maybe that's a project that you could start. You could start working on your Animal Crossing land. It doesn't have to be huge.

Speaker 1: 16:44

Baking or cooking dinner Like that can be a project in itself. I got a coloring book and some markers. Sudoku puzzles, word searches these things can actually just help you to feel like you're accomplishing something without it being added pressure to your plate. It's just something fun for you to do. It's a project you enjoy doing. Grabbing a book that's on your bedside table that you've been really wanting to read for a long time just grab it and then text me and be like hey, jess, I grabbed that book, I started that book, I started a project and you don't have to finish it.

Speaker 1: 17:20

But starting something brings that energy in you. Finishing it's gonna bring an energy too, but I just wanna remind you, starting something in this season, even if it's really hard, is gonna be really good for you. So find a project and just start it. And then the last thing I have on my list that's really really helpful this time and also really hard. Can I just recognize for a second that all of these things are really hard when you don't feel like doing it and you don't feel like showing up and you don't feel like you doing these things are really hard. So I'm clapping for you and I'm celebrating you as you take steps in these directions to feel a little better, because these are the things that are gonna make you feel better, even though they're really really hard to start. So it's just like getting that snowball and we're gonna roll it into a snowman and we're starting really small and it's really hard to get that ball rolled into something big to make the base of a snowman. We're starting with little baby steps and as you start to roll that snowball, it gets bigger and it gets bigger and it gets easier and it gets easier. And I just want you to kind of like picture Olaf the snowman as you do this, okay. So we're starting with something small. It's just one step at a time and I'm just like over here celebrating you, and if you need a little like extra celebration, please send me a message, connect with me, because I'm so freaking proud of you for doing something for yourself.

Speaker 1: 18:38

But the last one I have on my list and it's probably the hardest okay Is to get around good people. If you're an introvert like me, sitting alone on a microphone in your office in your silent house feels like a beautiful thing, right. Or sitting on the couch and not ever putting pants on for the whole winter season feels pretty good For my extroverts. You're probably already out there. You probably already made plans with all your friends. You're doing the thing, okay.

Speaker 1: 19:05

This one's more for my introverts, who don't really want to go out in the winter time because it is a lot okay. You need to get around good people and, whether that's online, digitally, in the sisterhood and the selfish sisterhood, we are there to support you and to love you and to be that light for you without having to leave the house, okay. But physical, actual hugs and connection and all of those things make a big difference too. Like a really big difference, and I know this one's hard, because it's really hard for me. I'm the person who organizes the events and I still have to give myself a pep talk to get out the door and to get to it, okay. So I just want you to remember that getting around good people is actually gonna fuel you up. It's gonna help you to just feel alive, even if it's just for a couple hours, okay, and then you can go back to hermit mode, you can go back to sitting on the couch, but go and get around to your people. They are gonna fuel you and they are gonna give you life in the season. That feels really hard.

Speaker 1: 20:05

And there are still a couple spots left for tomorrow's selfish social. We're going to the splatter room oh my gosh, I'm so excited. And we're gonna like splat paint on everybody and I'm just like so stoked. So, find something that gets you excited because, like, I'm ready to go. That's one that I'm not gonna have to convince myself too much to go to. I'm like, yeah, I can't wait to throw paint on my friends and there is still a few spots left, so I'll put that in the show notes too.

Speaker 1: 20:30

If you're listening to this in real time, you're like oh, that does sound really fun. And I'm in Halifax, you know what? I'm just gonna go. Just convince me to get around good people. I'm gonna go. There are some amazing women coming to this event. I'm so excited. But find yourselves some good people and get around them.

Speaker 1: 20:47

And if you don't have that, if you live in a small town and you just don't have that physical support, please check out the Selfish Sisterhood. A digital community for you might be exactly what you need, where you don't have to put pants on and you can just show up to your calls. You could be like a new mom breastfeed a mama. Like come on these calls, like it is very welcoming, okay, you come exactly as you are, with your stains all over you, your hair's a mess, you haven't showered in a week. We love you 100%.

Speaker 1: 21:15

So these are just a couple of things to help you step into that energy of beating the winter blues or just boosting yourself up a little bit right now Because, again, I know it's really hard you can amplify your self care if you want, go out for a manicure or take a really long bath or anything right. Again, it goes back to what do you need and amplify that self care right now, or you really could just start with a minute of sunshine in your eyeballs, one minute, and you don't even really have to go outside. It could just be from the window if you want. But these small steps are gonna help you to feel more confident, are gonna help you to feel really good and are gonna help you to just step into the light, step into your magic.

Speaker 1: 21:57

In this season, that feels hard and if you need some extra support and you need some extra love, I want you to send me a message, connect with me online and really just know that I'm here for you, cause I know, as a Canadian, in the thick of the snow, I see you and I feel you and I really want you to find a little bit of joy in this season. So I hope you have a wonderful week and I can't wait to talk to you soon. What's up, cess? I am so glad we could hang out today. If you love this episode, send it to a friend or share it on your social media and tag me so I can personally thank you for helping me sprinkle some confidence in the world. And don't forget you are magic. Let's show the world your shine.